Juggling Life

Girlfriend, Boss, Future Mother in Law and housemate.. All of these people have different needs and expectations. It was once said that a man has to be able to write sonets, serenade his love, compose peotry, cook, clean after himself, do maths, manage & earn money, take care of children, fix the broken tap, buy groceries, does his job and deliver on time, drive a car, plan a holiday for someone and well survive without housemate paying his rent and all.. And yet still come out smiling. Of course this is my rendition of what was originally said by.. someone. But the point is somehow we must pull this through and not fret or complain. If we ever do so than we are considered weak, disorganised or worse lazy.. Some of this task is mundane and rather easy.

But when your boss gives you pressure to deliver, your girlfriend is away from home for the first time and she keeps crying and she is sick and she expects you to call to Japan with your already tight budget and also your housemate has not pay the rent and you cannot find where the hell is he.. I guess it kinda a burden for me already. And her mom is also coming on Monday to help me out to get a job in Thailand.. (I really appreciate that) but that means well, social expectations.. I think deep in my mind is I don't want to screw up.

Anyway, I must pull through this I tell myself. When is my pay coming?? 28th Aug it seems. but her mom is coming on the 27th!! Well good thing she will be landing here only at 10.30 pm. Means to hotel and nap nap hehe..

My housemate haven't pay his rent. Means I am short of RM250 and my bank.. No money. Wallet only some coins. This is going to be a sad weekend. No where to go and no money damn. On top of that, my dad calls and seems like he needs money from me. Sigh, the guilt is so heavy.

Boss says I have to deliver my work this Monday, that is why I am here at work today. Sigh, should spend less time writting this blog and get back to work. Just another sad story from a loser. Hope I can get through this. Something I have learnt; "see ler, try to be hero ler.. hero die young don't you know that?" That is what I get for trying to be more than I ever can be. try to be the strong shoulder for others.. I bang head on with walls.. Really hard..

My Baby is Going to Japan

I think many people would like to travel and the thought of going to Japan.. wow.. This Sunday, she is going to Japan for 2 weeks. Where in this land, its hard for me to reach her by the usual means of telephone. So I guess internet is the next best thing. I can't help feeling down knowing she will be miles further away from me than she already is. Distance do make the heart grows fonder.

Initially when she told me that she got the job to be flight attendant.. I was really sad and disappointed. It was so hard for me to let her go. Now the time has really come. I have accepted her ambition already. Tried to encourage her as much as I can to stay on her course in realising her dream. Gave her all my best wishes and kissed her forehead telling her to go ahead. Sometimes I feel like I am already a father, getting older beyong my actual age.

She told me that training in Japan will be a lot harder than what she went through in Bangkok. I hope that she can take it. It's a feeling like seeing your own child going to study abroad for the first time. A lot of apprehension and fears that something will go wrong. Wanting for some moment to go with her and make sure she is alright. But to look at the bright side, this is a chance for her to be more independent. And I do hope her health can take it.

This few days its like a dark cloud hovering above my head. It seems like it will be raining on me. I know she is afraid to go there too. After all its her first time truly away from home. She has travel before to visit friends and all. But this time its about work and discipline. Not where is the fun in that. I guess this is the last few steps to realise her dreams.

Hope she stay course and move forward and her health gets better and not worse.

Lynn, love you.. I really want to make it in life with you. Like I have always told you, there is only 1 Lynn, please take good care of her. Cause I cannot find any more replacements IF I lost my one and only..

Baby..ni tze wo ther wei ee.. haha Wong Lee Hom's song that "you are my one and only"..